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  Penelope's Irish Experiences

  Published 1901.

  To my first Irish friend, Jane Barlow.

   Part First--Leinster.
 
  Chapter I. We emulate the
       Rollo books.

    'Sure a terrible time
         I was
               out o' the way,
    Over the sea,
           over the sea,
    Till I
          come to Ireland
               one sunny day,-
    Betther for me,
           betther for me:
    The first time me fut
     got the feel
        o' the ground
    I was strollin'
           along in an Irish city
    That hasn't
           its aquil
         the world
           around For the air
         that is sweet an'
               the girls
         that are pretty.'

                                                 --Moira O'Neill.

                              Dublin, O'Carolan's Private Hotel.

    It is the
           most absurd thing
         in the world
         that Salemina,
           Francesca,
         and I
            should be in Ireland together.

    That any three spinsters
        should be fellow-travellers
            is not in itself extraordinary,
           and so our former journeyings
               in England and Scotland
            could hardly
                  be described
                       as eccentric in any way;
        but now
             that I
                am a matron and Francesca
                    is shortly to be married,
           it is odd,
         to say the least,
           to see us cosily ensconced
               in a private sitting-room
                   of a Dublin hotel,
         the table laid for three,
           and not a vestige
               of a man anywhere
              to be seen.

    Where,
           one might ask,
         if he
            knew the antecedent circumstances,
           are Miss Hamilton's American spouse
               and Miss Monroe's Scottish lover?

    Francesca had
          passed most
               of the winter in Scotland.

    Her indulgent parent
        had given his consent
               to her marriage
             with a Scotsman,
           but insisted
             that she take
                   a year
                      to make
                           up her mind as
             to which particular one.

    Memories of her past flirtations,
           divagations,
         plans for a life
               of single blessedness,
           all conspired
              to make him incredulous,
         and the loyal Salemina,
           feeling some responsibility
               in the matter,
         had elected
              to remain
                   by Francesca's side
                  during the time
             when her affections
                were supposed
                      to be crystallising
                           into some permanent form.

    It was natural enough
         that my husband and
           I should spend
               the first summer
             of our married life abroad,
           for we had been accustomed
              to do this
             before we met,
         a period
             that we always
                  allude to
                       as the Dark Ages;
        but no sooner had
             we arrived in Edinburgh,
           and no sooner
            had my husband
                   persuaded our two friends
                  to join us
                       in a long,
         delicious Irish holiday,
           than he
            was compelled
                  to return to America
                       for a month or so.

    I think you
        must number
               among your
                 acquaintances
                    such a man
               as Mr. William Beresford,
           whose wife
             I have
                   the honour to be.

    Physically the type is vigorous,
           or has the appearance
            and gives the impression of
               being vigorous,
         because it
            has never the time
                  to be otherwise,
           since it
            is always
                  engaged in nursing its ailing
                      or decrepit relatives.

    Intellectually it
        is full of vitality;
           any mind grows
             when it is exercised,
           and the brain
             that has
                  to settle
                       all its own affairs
                     and all the affairs
                           of its friends
                         and acquaintances
                could never lack energy.

    Spiritually it
        is almost too good
               for earth,
           and any woman
             who lives
                   in the house
                 with it
                has moments of despondency
                       and self-chastisement,
         in which
             she fears
               that heaven
                may prove all too small
                      to contain the perfect
                    being and its
                         unregenerate
                            family as well.

    Financially it
        has at least a moderate
               bank account;
        that is,
           it is never penniless,
         indeed it
            can never afford to be,
           because it is peremptory
             that it should possess
                 funds in order
                       to disburse them
                     to needier brothers.


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